What is Work-Life Balance?

Work–Life Balance: What It Really Means

One of the questions I get asked most often is: “How do I find work–life balance?”
But honestly, when people ask me that, I think what they’re really asking is: “How do I be in two places at once? Multiple places at once? How do I do everything all the time, live up to impossible standards, and somehow ‘have it all’?”

And first, let’s be real—what does it feel like to be completely out of balance? Most of us know this pretty dang well. Maybe you just worked an 80–hour week on a huge project. By the time it’s over, you’re exhausted and beating yourself up over everything you missed—your aunt’s Labor Day barbecue, time with your family, space for yourself. People ask, “Where were you?” and inside, you feel guilt and shame, like you’ve failed.

The same thing can happen on the home front. Maybe it’s soccer or baseball season, and suddenly your calendar is swallowed by games, practices, playdates, and events. You’re stretched so thin you start losing a sense of who you are, wondering why you can’t just “do all the things.”

Here’s the hard truth: none of us can create time out of thin air. We all get the same 24 hours. Sometimes you’ll be pulled hard into work. Sometimes home life will demand everything you’ve got. If balance means “perfectly doing everything at once,” then we’ve set ourselves up for failure.

But maybe that’s the wrong definition.

Rethinking Balance

Have you ever stood on a wobble board in physical therapy or at the gym? It’s a flat disc with a ball underneath, and the goal is to balance on it. The thing is—you never stand perfectly still on it. If you did, you wouldn’t actually be using your muscles, training your stability, or growing stronger. Balance on a wobble board isn’t about being still—it’s about constant micro–adjustments. It’s about movement, about coming back to center again and again.

What if work–life balance worked the same way?

Instead of defining balance as “doing all the things all the time,” what if we defined it as the ability to come back to center? Yes, sometimes you’ll get pulled into a big work project. Yes, sometimes you’ll get lost in the whirlwind of family life. But balance isn’t failing when you get knocked off—it’s choosing to return.

The Real Answer

So maybe the better question isn’t “How do I find balance?” but:

1. Figure out what your center is.
   Where are you absolutely irreplaceable? What’s the place that matters most? Balance starts when you know where “home” is for you.
2. Practice returning to center—with compassion.
   Because you will get pulled off course. You will get unbalanced. That’s not failure—it’s part of the process. Balance isn’t stationary; balance is movement. It’s the certainty that at any moment you can make the decision to simply begin again.

👉 In other words: work–life balance isn’t about cloning yourself to be everywhere at once. It’s about rhythm, alignment, and recovery. It’s about the muscle of returning—again and again—to what matters most.